Madam Trixies Blog

As one gets older it is soon realized that the act of pernocation gets more difficult. Whether you are partying, studying for a test, or pulling an all-nighter for work(especially when you run an Internet Solutions Company). I noticed that when people stay up all night they tend to become very cranky and irritable and that can surely rub off on someone close to you. So as you can see in the image above, I have created my own solution to the annoying utterances in the room, the distractions per say. I have devised a Shhh stool also referred to as a please shut the f^&* up because I’m tired and I don’t want to hear you right now stool. I have to admit that to date it has worked wonderfully as a conversation piece which was not my intentions with it but it makes for a good laugh.

Anyone who is anybody can relate to this example:
It is 2:33 am on a Friday night and the bars have just closed and the boys from the bachelor party just showed up gearing up to get down. I like to call them the midnight marauders…they usually exemplify the following characteristics- loud boisterous voices, interrupters of conversation, yard urinators who let the dog out on accident, cigarette ash droppers, and the ones who actually pee in the toilet either leave the seat up or pee on it…gross!

And let it be noted that when the midnight marauders appear you should take the initiative to hide your “feel goods” in this case I am talking about my Coors Light. Before I knew it my last 2 beers were gone, mia…imagine that.

Let me take this blog post to another level if you may…It is not the sloppy piss or the ashes on the floor or even the suggestion of watching pornographic films that really urks me…it is all the shit talking that goes along with it. You can clean up the tangible messes with some Windex or some Lysol, no problem…but the shit talking becomes a permanent stain in this wardrobe of a life. A stain that can only be removed with a spray from the bottle of apology under the kitchen sink, if you know what I mean.

I try to keep the shit chat to a minimum…hence the “Shhh Stool”.

As you can imagine there are a manillion ways to use the Shhh stool aka “sacred stool of shut up”.

I am thinking of mass marketing them…I think they would sell. Let me know if you interested in buying one…I will customize it for you… just hit me up on myspace I mean my myspace.

Hey 33?

Signing out to “Strut” by Sheen Easton…hehehe

The secret word of the day is Fusstle

Fusstle - (n) [fuss-uhl]- Fusstle is the predicate of hustle. It is the fuss of the hustle. It is the haggle.
Ex. - Mr. and Mrs. Smith got so caught up in the fusstle that they nearly forgot to have fun at the event they were attending.

Sometimes the Paparazzi’s fusstle and method of journalism is so obsolete and annoying and they will…

Are you one of those people who says stoopid stuff all the time? By stupid I am referring to #1-4 in the previous link…if u didn’t click on it I would suggest you do that now…
Well if you are you probably don’t know you are or you know you r and don’t care…
Let it be known that stoopid is not funny…funny is funny…like funny is not stupid.
For example Jackass 2 was repulsively funny.

A great example of something stoopid is (insert name here).

Here’s one method I have developed for personally dealing with stoopid people:
I write their names in my 1989 Websters New World Third Edition Dictionary under what ever adjective(such as STUPID) they may epitomize. Why? because:
it makes me feel better
writing it beats the heck out of verbalizing it
and one day my 1989 Websters dictionary will be history, something that will either be passed down from generation to generation or be sold at a yard sale for $33.00. But who knows and who really wants to think that far ahead…not me…I prefer to live in the NOW…thnx

I have found this method most satisfying…because I have learned that telling stoopid people they are stoopid is just STOOPID~

So the moral of the story is…
There are a manillion people in the world for which we communicate with a % of them daily…Those people either like u for who u really are or they don’t…and my theory is and I quote ” If you don’t like me then move on because there are a manillion other people for you to like”
It’s really that simple…it’s amazing!

So what makes a person stoopid? their intentions perhaps…I haven’t come to a concrete conclusion yet…but i will continue to use the scientific method on this…….HA

As far as I know noone stoopid reads my shit…but one can only wish..

For once someone please feel free to comment on here and tell me something you find stoopid!

now i have to find a picture of stoopid for this post…hahaha better hope its not you…see that’s funny!

“The very purpose of existence is to reconcile the glowing opinion we have of ourselves with the appalling things that other people think about us.”
- Quentin Crisp

The Secret Word of The Day - (swotd) is dream

There are many theories about where, why, and what inspires dreams. I am a dreamer…and what I mean by that is I like to sleep because usually my dreams are way more exciting than my life…I’m not saying my life is boring…but the redundancy of awake life gets annoying sometimes. I am one of those who NEED change in my life…and the more change that occurs, the happier I become. (of course prefer positive change over negative change…but can’t have one without the other that’s why I came up with the analogy - “life is a rollercoaster on a highway” - There will be ups and downs, thrills and chills, emotions dominate us from start to finish, there is a beginning and an end…but remember this, rollercoasters symbolize or represent FUN and most importantly you are givin the oppurtunity to build your own…it just takes a little thought…and then the action begins…So strap on your seat belt or in my case put your helmet on pray for the best and the opportunity to ride again sometime!

I dream in color and 75% of the time when I awake I can remember my dreams down to the smallest details and I can recall how I felt in my dream…I can still recall probably 20% of my dreams and have recently started to record them. I used to own one of those dream dictionaries, but to be honest I’m glad I lost it because I don’t believe that someone can tell me what my dreams symbolize…I mean come’on…show me some statistics on that!

My theory on DREAMS:
From personal experience I believe that when you sleep(rem stage) your brain is processing your memories from your awake time…makes sense to me…I have experienced it and seen enough of it to come to the conclusion that the longer one stays awake for longer than 12 hours the more significant the decrease in their brain function becomes. So in summary, when u sleep your brain processes your memories…and when u wake up u start all over again. That explains why your eyeballs move…there’s some crazy shit going on. And the fun part is when u wake up, and if you remember your dream(s) think about what you did yesterday and see if there’s any association if not than maybe it’s “What Dreams May Come”.

How to dream better
I noticed that everytime I eat carrots close to bedtime my dreams are more vivid. So I know eat carrots every night before I lay the down to sleep. Let me know if it works for you…consider this a social psychological experiment…

The Secret Word of The Day - (swotd) is FRIENDS …lAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

People come and go…life comes and goes…but memories always stay and best friends are 4eva
Mom - (hippocampus) mom not a rhinosaurus…and where ever you decide to travel to first whether Africa or Down Town…make sure you get to pet one these… in title look up to address bar…what do you call that?
(it’s name is jenny…you must have her)

Jennifer Skeeter Pedersen - “I wanna singa about the moona and the juna and the springa” and YOU! oh and let us not forget your fashion advise!
“To faux pas or not to faux pas” That is the question!

Queen B - It’s that time of year again…Happy B’Day…I can never remember exactly which day it falls on…King said the 7th?…but I know it’s labor day(hahaha) and it’s not Queen B’s birthday its the beginning of his birth MONTH!!! (back in the when i was young…im not a kid anymore) but nevertheless still lack discipline…but i did learn from the BEST! Shannon and CMB your presence is very missed and I’m thinkin The 33King Network might have to come to Montana…

Man…Like fer real…I can honestly say that I have been too busy lately to keep up with my swotd (secret word of the day) daily posts…as was the goal. But I must say that busy is a wonderful feeling. What’s even more exciting is I was able to overcome my severe depression from the last 2 months…Since I am against 97% of perscription medications. Don’t get me started on that!

Anyways I was up late one night and I happened to catch this infomercial for the stuff called Mood Plus. Now anyone can pretty much slap that name on something and people would take it if they thought it would make them feel better…right? So I did my research…
And wouldn’t you know the main ingrediat in this pill - mood enhancer is SAM-e…I thought NOSHIT! There’s a pill that you take called SAM-e that:

Nature Made MoodPlus® enhances mood by promoting a healthy balance of neurotransmitters dopamine and serotonin, which contribute to overall healthy brain cell functions. Researchers have found that supplementation of this mood enhancer can be just as effective as commonly recommended solutions, without significant side effects. People taking Nature Made MoodPlus® reported feeling benefits in one week.†

Helps support detoxification and overall liver health functions.†

Promotes joint health by helping to maintain joint cartilage, which naturally deteriorates with physical activity and age.†

This shit sounds too good to be true…I havta try it and not because we share the name pronunciation…well actually…

I got myself a box of Moodplus SAM-e stress relief and followed the instructions and dam if this shit didn’t help SAM I AM. My mood did change that day. I started getting more energy which increased my productivity and I could actually feel my brain and body “Getting Better Everyday”. I took these things..I felt myself getting smarter…or maybe not smarter but my memory sure did restore itself…now these thingys are a little pricey but definantly worth it…I took the dosages as perscribed on zaaa-box and meccaleccahighmeccahineyho…like magic - I felt happiness again. I actually wanted to wake up in the morning and get my shit done and finally face all the endless drama of NPR $ PR again and again and again…If you come around my town you ought not come without a helmet, picnic basket, cooler, and don’t forget to Enjoy Zawada!